Which Theatre Kid Stereotype Are You?

We all know that theatre kids get a lot of flack. I’d say we’re at least on par with band kids and horse girls as far as social standing is concerned. My current favorite meme is the one about how theatre kids should be the last to get vaccinated. Dark? Yes. Funny? Absolutely. Because I just have to say it: Those theatre kid jokes are sometimes well-deserved. We can be really annoying!

So what exactly constitutes a theatre kid and how can we still be ourselves without annoying everyone around us? Here are some of the categories that I use to describe some of the most obnoxious theatre kid stereotypes out there. Trust me, I’m sure you’ll be familiar with every single one of them.

But before we get started, I want to preface this by saying that this truly is written with love. I know for a fact that I fit into multiple categories on this list, and I can guarantee that I have done some super embarrassing theatre kid stuff. Singing musical theatre songs at an all-night diner after a high school production? Yeah, I’ve done that. And I’m sure that I’ve annoyed plenty of people out there with my theatre kid obnoxiousness. It’s time for me to take full responsibility for the ridiculousness of my behavior.

So which theatre kid stereotype(s) are you?

The Straight Guy

Every single theatre department has one: A straight boy with mediocre looks and medium talent who is somehow cast as every single male lead. This is the guy who is a decidedly normal person, yet is fawned over by every single straight girl in his high school production of Grease.

It’s not that I dislike the fact that this person is continuously cast or is beloved by those around him. What drives me crazy is the inevitable ego that accompanies this level of theatre kid fame. There is no way you can get that much attention without letting it go to your head.

The I <3 NYC Kid

Yes, there are a lot of theatre people who want to live in the Big Apple. I may not be one of them, but I can definitely understand the appeal. No, this theatre kid stereotype is meant for the people who have an unhealthy obsession with the concept of moving to New York.

This is the kid who says things like, “New York, you haven’t seen the last of me” as they ride the bus home from their school field trip to see a Broadway show. They’re the ones who stand in the middle of Time Square just to breathe in the energy of the city, and wax poetic about moving to NYC with just two dollars in their pocket and a whole lot of dreams. They plan on moving to New York the second they can and they definitely don’t understand people who don’t feel the same way.

The Theatre Makers™

There is a lot of pretentious energy amongst the stereotypes on this list, but I would argue that these guys take the cake. This stereotype is for the people who describe themselves as “theatre makers” and take the time to “explore the space” and “breathe in the room.” They answer questions in class using words like “liminal” and “juxtapose” and would probably be gung-ho about putting together a show reminiscent of SNL’s High School Theatre Showcase.

The Musical Theatre Kid

This stereotype doesn’t need a whole lot of explanation because they tend to get the most attention. These are the Broadway obsessed kids who sing songs as they skip through the hallways of the school. They know every line of every musical ever and they will make references whenever possible. Is it December 24th at 9 pm? They will remind you that “from here on in, they’re shooting without a script.” Did they just turn 19? Then they’ll probably use the Instagram caption, “Only 19 but my mind is older.”

They’re not afraid of jazz hands or time steps at inappropriate times, and they will absolutely get a musical theatre tattoo of some kind.

The Show Off

This theatre kid stereotype often overlaps with the previous one. These are the kids who know the name of every single actor in every single show on Broadway and who will name drop whenever they can. They have seen every Broadway show, probably multiple times, and they won’t let you forget it. No, you should feel ashamed that you didn’t know that it was Jeremy Jordan or Andrew Rannells or Aaron Tveit in that one show that one time. So why is this theatre kid making you feel like you should be?

The Classical Actor

Finally, we have the Shakespeare-obsessed classical actors. I ask that when you read the word “actors” in that last sentence that you imagine it said in the most pretentious voice possible. These are the theatre kids who claim that they have no problem understanding Shakespeare and want to make sure that you know that they have no problem understanding Shakespeare. They “get” classical theatre, and they think that makes them better than everyone else.

So there you have it. Was this list harsh? Probably. But we theatre kids need a wake-up call! Do we want to keep annoying everyone around us or do we want to figure out what we’re doing wrong and fix it?

That said, I hope that, above all, this list makes you laugh. I’m sure you can think of someone for every single category on this list, and that you can probably add a few categories of your own. We may be annoying, but we have a great time, and I will always love the crazy theatre kids in my life.