I’m Not Rude, It’s Just Auditions.

Liz Chirico

• Massachusetts Columnist

My name is Liz and I’m tremendously rude at auditions/callbacks. There. I said it. Man does it feel good to have that off my chest. I’m not normally like this. I’m normally a enormously likeable and sweet, a downright chatty person. It’s just… auditions, the nerves, the what-ifs. 

Give me my own littler corner (I don’t need a chair) and let me look at my music one last time. Let me listen to my recording. Let me run through a dance routine to limber up before it’s time for five-six-seven-eight. Let me close my eyes and go through some deep meditative-yoga breathing. Sometimes that’s the only thing to calm my nerves, settle my shaking hands and prevent my throat from tightening into something air can barely pass through let alone sound.

My very demeanor is exuding “leave me alone” and that’s probably to people who know me well and can realize it’s only nerves. I recognize it’s a fine line between someone understanding it’s simply nerves vs. I’m a cold, rude person in real life. But I can’t help it. My eyes look down, my lips won’t curl in anything remotely resembling a smile. Sometimes I don’t even know who else is at auditions with me. But if you overhear anything it’s equal parts psyching myself up and snippets of my monologue I’m repeating to help calm my nerves. 

I realize that for some, they may deal with those nerves by talking, maybe even excessively so. I’m all for that. Auditions are tough enough- do what you have to in order to survive. But please, find someone with their head up, smiling as they look about the room. If you approach me and I don’t answer your question with anything more than a one word mumble, don’t take it personally. I’m not rude, it’s just auditions.

Photo: David Lassman / The Post-Standard