The Alice Ripley Allegations Have Started a Needed Conversation and the Theatre Community Isn't Ready

CW: Rape and Sexual Assault, Abuse (physical, mental, emotional, verbal, sexual), Child abuse/pedophilia.

Last week, Tony-Winning Actress Alice Ripley was accused of “grooming” by a group of fans with who she interacted when they were teenagers. The majority of the interactions took place while Ripley was performing in both the Broadway and National Tour productions of Next to Normal.

I’m not going to run down the entire timeline of what Ripley is being accused of. The Daily Beast published a great story that covered the accusations and can be seen here.

Instead, I want to talk about some aspects of this story that many seem to be missing, on both sides.

I also want to touch on where do we go from here. It’s very clear that these accusations have kickstarted a conversation about how theatre artists interact with their fans and vice versa. There needs to be solutions and action plans that result from these conversations and I’ve got some ideas I want to share with you. So, let’s get into it.

Details that need to be discussed

Over the past week, I took a hard look at every accusation that was raised against Ripley. To prepare for this article, I spoke to over a dozen people. I spoke to some of those who brought forth these accusations against Ripley. I also spoke to witnesses. I spoke to hard-liner defenders of Ripley who don’t believe a shred of what’s been said about her. I spoke to trained medical professionals when it comes to abuse and grooming. Finally, I reached out to Alice Ripley herself, but I have not gotten a reply to that request.

I found it important to do this because this is such a sensitive issue that deserves research. Because I’ve seen too many comments on social media that clearly didn’t perform due diligence and, instead, simply (and disgustingly) diminished these young people. When I see comments like that, I shudder to think what it’s going to take for victims in this industry to be believed by this industry.

So, what needs further discussion? Let’s start with the term “grooming”. I need to reiterate that I am not a trained professional in this area and am simply passing on the research and input from the professionals I spoke with.

In the initial accusations against Ripley, she was accused of grooming, which is a term commonly used for manipulative behaviors that abusers use to gain access to a potential victim, coerce them to agree to the abuse, and reduce the risk of being caught.

Because this tool is commonly used by sexual abusers, and since none of Ripley’s accusers were accusing her of that, many were quick to invalidate their use of the word grooming.

But it’s important to know that while grooming is a tool that sexual abusers use, in the end, it’s simply a tool that is not exclusive to sexual abuse. It can be used to gain any sort of advantage on a victim. Often, those use it to gain the trust of potential victims through attention, sharing “secrets”, and other means to make them feel that they have a caring relationship and to train them to keep the relationship secret.

Did Alice Ripley allegedly groom these young people in hopes of sexually abusing them? It doesn’t appear that way. Did she apparently use the tool of grooming for other purposes with these fans? That’s an entirely different discussion.

And that’s where I find myself. I’m not going to say that Alice Ripley groomed these young fans and I’m also not going to say she didn’t because I’m not qualified to make that call. But I am going to say that her interactions with them were inappropriate. Especially given that these were teenagers who were at an already vulnerable age and more so given some of them were living with mental illness.

I spoke to one of the individuals who came forward to corroborate the accusations and they said something that has stayed with me throughout this process,

“Each of our experiences was different, but they all followed similar patterns, the most common one being that we all thought this was normal. You don’t question things if you think they’re normal.”

Now, did Ripley know she was being manipulative with these young fans? Did she know she was overstepping her boundaries? I don’t know, only she knows that. But should she have known? Absolutely. She was the adult in the room. She was the one replying to emails that shouldn’t have been replied to. She was inviting teenage fans back to her dressing room, unsupervised. She was the one casually having physical contact with him. And once again, keep in mind, these were teenagers.

And while this all occurred more than a decade ago, it’s not as if it was appropriate then, a decade prior to that, or now.

At the same time, those who are calling her a pedophile, are incorrect and are dangerously throwing around that term. She’s not being accused of sexual abuse of minors and shouldn’t be labeled as something that should only be reserved for those who commit those heinous acts.

Another line of defense I’m seeing of Ripley is along the lines of “she’s not being charged with any crime, so I’m not going to believe these allegations.”

What needs to be known is that we’re not necessarily talking about a chargeable crime, we’re talking about a pattern of inappropriate behavior. Ripley won’t be charged with a crime because, at least as of right now, she hasn’t been accused of any. Can unlawful grooming be applied to charges of sexual abuse? In some states, yes. Illinois for instance has a law like that. But Ripley’s alleged use of grooming doesn’t apply here, so there won’t be any arrests or charges. But as I stated above, that doesn’t necessarily mean she didn’t use the tool of grooming. So those who are defending her this way are setting a dangerous bar for victims to meet, especially when the justice system fails them.

Something else I’m seeing is the disgusting way these young fans have been described by people in this industry. They have been written off as “obsessed”, “crazy”, “unhinged”. First of all, that’s a disgusting way to describe people with mental illness who have experienced real trauma. Secondly, even if they were “crazy” or “obsessed”, Ripley should never have interacted with them in the ways she did.

Now, are fans blameless in situations like these? Not all the time. Performers have shown me a multitude of DM’s and other interactions from fans saying the most inappropriate things. But here’s a big difference – not a single one of those performers enabled or encouraged those types of interactions, nor attempted to develop and further those connections in the ways that Ripley did.

When speaking to a performer the other day who told me about their own “unhinged” interactions with fans, I asked them – “But would you have done what Ripley did?”

They paused before saying, “No. I wouldn’t have.”

And there you have it.

I spoke to another individual who came forward with their allegations who said something that I felt was really important,

“It is important to me that I'm characterized correctly. I was not a "super fan" in declining mental health chasing after her for a selfie, who has now grown embittered and vindictive with time because I was "ghosted." I was a very intelligent, resourceful teenager without supervision who trusted an adult who took advantage of me, ostensibly to stroke her own ego. All I'm trying to get across is that I never would have met this adult who hurt me (and many others like me) were there provisions in place to keep people of influence from forming this kind of relationship in the first place.”

And that leads me to what needs to be discussed next.

Where do we go from here?

Given the online discussion that these allegations have started, it’s become very clear that the ways fans and theatre artists interact with each other are going to change.

Theatre fandom is a unique thing. Unlike an A-list movie star, being part of a theatre fandom feels like a special club. It’s passionate and, at times, toxic. And with social media and stage dooring, the ways that theatre artists and fans can connect with one another are more accessible than ever.

While not every theatre artist or fan has taken advantage of this access, there have been some who have. We’ve seen it with James Barbour, who admitted to molesting a teenage fan in his dressing room after he brought her backstage, unsupervised when she had come to see his show. I also know a Broadway performer who had to take heartbreaking steps to ensure her safety while arriving and departing a theatre for each performance because of a fan who made threats against her. So, unfortunately, there are people out there that take advantage of the accessibility of Broadway performers and fans.

At the same time, I don’t want to see any theatre artist or fan incorrectly accused of wrongdoing. Many of them simply love interacting with each other and nothing has ever crossed that line.

So what can we do?

While I don’t know exactly what’s already in place, I do think there are steps that both sides can take to ensure that interactions are safe, fun, and appropriate. In fact, many are doing this already.

I think the first great step is for theatre artists to be completely clear with what their boundaries are and limit the ways fans can connect with them. I know one performer who makes it very clear when they are available for stage door meet-ups, how fans can email them and what will and won’t be responded to. I’ve seen others who have made it clear what will get fans blocked and reported on social media. I also think creating specific social media accounts strictly for fan interaction is always a good idea.

It’s never okay for a fan to overstep their boundaries but that’s why they need to know where those boundaries are. Ripley blurred that line and that’s where the problems occurred.

I also think that any public interaction with fans, such as stage door signings or backstage meetups needs to have a third party present at all times. I’m not talking about security personnel necessarily, but someone who can monitor interactions to make sure everyone is protected.

Finally, and again I don’t know if there is already being implemented, but training in social media interactions for theatre artists hosted by the unions or given during rehearsal periods is always a good idea too. Throughout my career, I’ve been given multiple pieces of training that have helped me effectively and safely communicate with others. I’d like to think this may be helpful in the theatre industry as well.

Before Broadway resumes and fans start flocking the theatres, now is the perfect time to implement these types of changes.

In the end

As I mentioned before, theatre fandom is a unique thing that can be amazing and sometimes, toxic. So I support any measures for the two sides of artists and fans to protect, while at the same time, celebrating each other.

When it comes to Alice Ripley, mistakes were clearly made and Ripley should have known better. Do I think she should be canceled or have her career destroyed over this? I don’t really know. Should she have responded to the allegations differently? 100% yes. Do I think others should be “canceled” for defending her? No. But many of them need to respond better because some of their comments have been ghastly.

During the time the theatre industry has been shut down, the culture has changed. The voiceless have been empowered to speak up and more people are starting to listen. I worry about the way industry powers have responded to this situation and others like it because I know future issues are going to come out and this community needs to be ready for them. The conversations need to change, otherwise, it will only work to prevent the empowered to become voiceless again.

To help you recognize warning signs or to get support if you find out a child or teen in your life has been abused, you can speak with someone who is trained to help. Call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673) or chat online at online.rainn.org. It’s free, confidential, and 24/7.